This is a transcribed version of my podcast episode
Today’s topic is about what you can do to find your purpose.
I highly recommend you take notes because this might help you answer the question- what am supposed to be doing with my life.
And how do I know that ? How can I possibly tell you about what you’re meant to do when I don’t even know a thing about your life?
Well let’s say it’s not about me knowing exactly what you need to do. It will be about triggering that feeling that will leave you knowing what you want to do or don’t want to do- which for me it’s just as valuable because knowing what you don’t want to do is also knowing what you want. That’s the whole point of this episode so stick with me.
Right, just a quick note before I start, you’ll notice a lot of the stuff I will be telling in my episodes relates to me and my experiences, not that I just like talking about myself, sadly my life isn’t that interesting! It’s literally only because it is very likely that you find yourself in a similar situation and sometimes it’s just easier to hear when someone goes through the same thing. And also, It’s about authenticity- I’m not here to tell my stories for the sake of telling them, otherwise I’d write a book and boom, done! You wouldn’t have to bare with my voice.
What I want you to take from this podcast is food for thought. Take whatever you feel is suitable to you, whether it’s just one word, the first or the last sentence I don’t care, just mould it according to your experiences, make it your own, as long as it’s useful to you, as long as it makes you think a little, or take action, even better.
My words might be what you needed to hear just at the right time. That’s why I am doing it. I started this podcast because I heard something I needed to hear a month ago and that triggered me. So I hope that has the same effect on you.
Ok, let’s start because I feel like I’ve been talking a lot and you still don’t know what your purpose is, right. A bit deceiving all this!
So whenever I sat down and thought to myself, Zinab, what is it that makes you happy ? Or makes you feel alive? I’d be just sat there like, well this makes me happy, or that makes me happy but then that would be it. Like even though I thought I had an answer by just saying it or writing it down, an hour later I’d still be asking myself the same question.
Because I believe the answer is not on a sheet of paper, and I’m daring to say that it’s not necessarily in your head either. Not because you think that a specific thing makes or would make you happy, means it’s the ultimate thing or way to happiness or fulfilled life, whatever you call it.
Don’t get me wrong, of course if you know yourself a minimum you know when you’re happy doing something, but sometimes that thing is temporary or is I’m daring again to say too average.
Like you will do whatever but that would just leave you feeling okay, just good enough, just as long as you’re not miserable, that’s fine.
But to me, that’s not it. That’s not it. When you find your purpose, you will feel fire in your guts trust me. Literally fire. It’s a nice and actually very scary feeling, because it is overwhelming, and consuming. And it should be overwhelming. You’ll get what I mean by that later.
Now how do you find out about that feeling ?
The simple answer to that question is pay attention to where your energy goes. That’s literally it. Energy doesn’t lie. Now you want to kill me because you’ve waited all this time for me to tell you Pay attention to where your energy goes. Like you kidding me ? I could have got that myself.
No but I say it again, because I think we don’t pay attention enough. We’re often caught in a situation and rarely stop to check how we’re actually feeling about a thing; Or we think about it but we don’t dive deeper, like right what does that mean ? What am I actually doing here?
I will help you get to that. First thing I want you to do- I want you to stop and think about what you’re currently doing, as in not right now but your main occupation, what you do in your daily life. If you have time to do this with me right now do it because I’m dead serious about it, but if not come back to this episode later and do this little exercise. And then, I want you to project yourself in the future, I don’t know maybe in 5 year’s time. Once you’ve done that, the question is how does that make you feel ? Like genuinely. Sit with the feeling. What does your mind tell you? What does your stomach and your guts tell you?
Do you feel excited ? Do you see yourself doing what you’re currently doing and you feel like you could do that for 10 more years ? Do you feel amazing, powerful, and ready to explore even more ? You have many options in front of you ? Or do you feel miserable, sad, depressed ? Like just the thought of it makes you sick, and your chest is getting tight and you wanna die right now? Or maybe it’s not that bad but you’re telling yourself, well I wish by then, I’ll be doing something else. And I won’t be stuck.
I promise you, it sounds very vague, I am 100% aware of that but by paying attention to this and maybe even writing it down, it’s the beginning of you making a change in your life, whether you have a very precise feeling or thoughts or not. You’re forcing your mind to start doing the work. And we all know the hardest thing to do when we want to start something is the start.
So think about it again. How does that genuinely make you feel ?
And again, whether you know what to do with the answer or not right now, you’re already inevitably creating multiple roads for you to take. You’re creating a range of possibilities in front of you. You will start seeing things differently, making different decisions. Or at least give you some sort of direction.
If projecting yourself in the future is too scary, maybe just go back to the present and pay attention to where your energy goes again. Pay attention to your energy when you’re working (if you are- I’m just taking this as an example). Is your energy off ? Are you working just like robot, do you feel like you drag your feet to go to work. Or do you feel amazing? How do you feel when your alarm goes on and you have to get up? Is that motivation or you’re just being a machine and you get up because your job pays the bills?
Very personal note- like I said in the beginning- that little exercise is what made me start my podcast. I mentioned briefly in the first episode if you listened to it that I work as a finance analyst. As boring as it may sound, I know I can’t blame you (laughs), I actually worked for the coolest TV and film companies so far from being boring but then when I asked myself this and tried to picture myself in 5 years time, asking myself, Zinab how do you feel about doing this ? Do you see yourself working for your whole life 9-5, basically counting money for rich people ? The answer was hell no. Then again, not necessarily even thinking about the future, I paid attention to where my energy goes while I was working. It was just not there. I would be working and my energy would go into I don’t know thinking about my next fitness workout or something stupid like that.
So I started paying more attention to more things. Like okay, if my energy is not in this, where is it ? And you have to make an effort to try and notice how you feel when you do something. Then you’ll know that’s it when like I said earlier you feel fire in your guts. When it makes you so excited about doing it or doing it again that it doesn’t let you sleep. And you don’t really know what to do with it, you just know it’s the right thing. That’s where you find fulfilment, you could do that all day long and you would be just fine. It will drive you and make you feel looking forward to doing it again. When you think of it, you will also think “I like really this version of myself”. I like when I’m thinking like that. I like when I do that. And I could see myself doing that.
A key point I wanna raise though is that your purpose won’t necessarily present itself to you by itself, like I don’t think you’ll wake up one day and be oh right, now I know, unless you had a night revelation or something. You need to create the opportunities for it to happen.
Another key point here, I’ve been talking about purpose and work in my examples but that applies to studies, to relationships and all the stuff that matters to you. If you’re in a relationship, well how do feel about yourself being in that same relationship in 5 years time? Does it bring the best out of you or do you feel trapped, wondering how you’ll even manage to deal with that person, does that feel draining, heavy ? If you’re studying, how do you feel about what you’re doing ?
Doubt is permitted but it’s different when it’s linked to negative energy.
What I’m saying is following that kind of process, if I can call it like that, triggers the start of decisions for you to make and you will naturally start paying attention to stuff you were not paying attention before. Whenever you feel some sort of resistance, it probably means it’s not the right thing for you. (11 mins) Energy doesn’t lie. Go where your energy goes. Follow it. I truly believe in this.
It will change, a 100%, but that’s what we’re supposed to do. Life moves and we move with it.
Now I’m talking to the lucky ones who think have found their way but don’t really know where to start. Well my friends, my third episode is just about that. About goals, about how do you make something come true ?